Mother-in-law Diaries

The Beat April 2003


By Scott Morley

2-20-03
"Scott, look at this. It's a brain spoon!" Mia's student holds up an awkwardly off-kilter golden spoon. More of a small ladle really. "Oh, do you eat brains with this spoon?" I ask. She says, "No silly! How foolish Scott! Nobody eats brains." I say, "sure, In Thailand they eat live monkey brains, and in some countries they eat brain cheese." She says, "Well, this spoon is to empower your brain." I assume that the funky twist in the ladle makes it tough to use, an exercise in dexterity.
But I'm wrong. The theory is similar to eating habits of Papuan highlanders in New Guinea. In some aboriginal cultures, witch doctors subscribe sections of meat that correspond to the area of a patient's ailment. Sometimes just a similar shape will do. Thus, if you hurt your leg you should eat leg-bone or something leg-shaped.
As it turns out, this golden spoon is shaped like a brain.
3-1-03
My "Imo," or aunt, is in the house. Her son is supposed to move into our bedroom. We are supposed to move into school housing, but the house is not ready. So we'l l all live in a kitchen together for the next six weeks.
Imo is actually an old neighbor and friend of my mother-in-law. She turns to me and says, "Your youngest son is so ugly!" We've been through this. Last time I saw her, Mia held me back as I went to slap her face. Today I just reply, "Your uglier."
"Scott!" Mia says, "That is so rude! Don't say that!" I say smiling, "Imo, you're fat and stupid too." She looks a bit confused but finishes her beer with a smile. Mia says it's custom for women to say these things about other people. In three years she's the only woman to say these things about my kids.
Imo's husband understands English and must know I hate his wife. He's not shaken up about it. After thirty years he probably feels the same.
I have a video. Everyone seems quiet and bored so I press play. Then Imo starts jabbering away. I turn up the volume and she shouts louder. I turn it to a painful volume but she screams and cackles. I shoot a nasty look at her and she smiles stupidly. The woman is a true rock-head. She shouts some more and positions herself between in front of the television. "Why is your wife so ugly?" she asks me, giggling. "Go away." I say. She laughs and babbles a bit more.
I elbow her away from the screen, but she does all she can to make me want to kick her. Finally I take my video and get dressed to leave. She turns on a melodrama, suddenly quiet, absorbed. I go to the door. "Dad, where you goin'?'" Alex asks. "To a hotel." I say. My mother-in-law looks worried and says stay, but stupid Imo says, "goodbye," and turns to her program.
That was weeks ago. Now we have her son, the Phys. Ed. major. In Korea a major like this might mean you can't get into engineering. I suspect this true of Imo's son. For two weeks he hasn't turned off the lights in his room. He needs them on when sleeping. I mention this to Mia and she shrugs. Originally my mother-in-law did not want to charge the kid for a room and three meals.
The reek of stale cigarettes wafts from under his door. My mother-in-law leaves him food but he never touches it. When he's gone Alex slips in and breaks things. I encourage him.
3-10-02
The other night I killed my first mammal, intentionally. It was an impressive brown rat glued to a sticky trap, next to the stacks of instant ramyan noodles on our store shelves.
The trap's position made it particularly difficult to get at. I didn't want to grab hold and get bitten. I tried to scoop it with a shovel but dumped it onto some open pots of bean sprouts. The sprouts stuck to the rat.
Finally I picked up the trap with my fingers and headed outside. "Kill it there!" shouted mother-in-law, pointing to a stairway next to our lettuce patch, leading to a middle school.
"Thwack!" I flattened the screaming beast and paused; silence, introspection, inspection for breathing or bloody concrete. Mother-in-law said "leave it there and let's have a beer." That was three days ago. The rat remains next to our lettuce. Alex practic
That was my second kill actually. My second year in Korea I mistakenly killed a little shit-puppy. My landlord had the poor pup tied to a foot long string for her grand daughter to play with. It was never released, so I asked to take him for walks.
I took him to my room. As he was sniffing around, I climbed onto my windowsill to pull in drying clothes. I was on my stomach, reaching out the window with my legs kicking behind me.
He must've thought this an invitation to play, because when I jumped down I landed on him. He'd been trying to catch my pant legs.
When my foot hit him he bellowed out and spun on his side. The dogs I'd grown up with were big, and if one responded like this it usually meant nothing. So I thought the pup was faking. But after tree minutes he was still twitching and spinning. I picked him up and his eyes were glazed. I talked to him, gave him doggie mouth-to-mouth. He seemed to be recovering.
I brought him to my Japanese roommate and her knees buckled. We rushed him to a vet. The doctor looked at him, shrugged, and gave us a plastic bag. "Throw him away. He's dead."
That night the ajjuma and I buried him beneath a strawberry patch on the mountain
3-12-03
A buddy of mine from New Zealand went out with a Korean guy, forty three years old. Nice guy, very sweet, a bit effeminate. Unemployed. Living with mom. My friend says to him, "where shall we eat?" He replies, "Oh, anywhere you like today. My mom gave me back her credit card!"
So they went to a popular western restaurant and bumped into a mutual friend. An American man, married to a Korean woman. They had a few drinks together and the American took off. "You know," said the Korean date, "if he were a woman, I'd ask him to marry me."
3-25-03
Everywhere, it seems I see manifestations of the Daegu fire. Hagwons blame new teachers with no experience and biology majors: Daegu fire. Repairmen canù repair, or just don't repair: Daegu fire. Drivers drive thoughtlessly, look barely beyond their noses: Daegu fire. Mothers watch their kids run into traffic: Daegu fires. College students enroll in three classes on the same day, at the same time, and the administration doesnù notice: Daegu fires. College students miss the first four weeks because of an ified: Daegu fires.


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