Living in Korea for the past two years, I often find myself learning more and more Korean phrases. For example, last year I lost my alien registration card and passport. Twice. Don't ask how. Losing your identification anywhere can result in a headache. However, losing your identification in Korea may lead to a full blown migraine! Here are a few useful phrases guarenteed to alleviate any undue stress. Many thanks to my students and Á¶ »ï »ó for their translations.

 1. °æÂû¼­´Â ¾îµð¿¡ ÀÖ½À´Ï±î?

 Kyun chal su nun odi ay issumnika?

 Where is the police station?

 The first thing you must do is go to the local police station and file a report. After becoming the proud owner of a cup of freshly brewed vending machine coffee, you can address the purpose of your visit.

 2. ¿Ü±¹Àεî·ÏÁõÀ» ÀÒ¾î¹ö·È½À´Ï´Ù.

 Way gook in dung roke jng ul il uh bu ryut sm ni da.

 I lost my alien registration card.

 ~To report a lost passport, simply replace ¿©±Ç À» for the subject.

 3. Áö°©À» µµµÏ¸Â¾Ò½À´Ï´Ù.

 Ji gap ul do dook ma jat sumnida.

 My wallet was stolen.

 After a lot of head scratching on everyone's part, you may now proceed to the all important phrase:

 4. ³ª´Â ±â·ÏÀ» ³²±â±â¸¦¿øÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

 Na nun gee roke ul nam gee gee rul won hamni da.

 I need to file a police report.

 The obvious questions of name, date of birth, place of residence and the number on the missing pieces of identification will follow.

 5. ¿Ü±¹Àεî·ÑÁõÀ»¹øÈ£´Â ________ ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

 Way gook in dung roll jung ul bun ho nun______imnida.

 My alien registration card number is______.

 ~Simply add the Korean word for the appropriate missing item to ¹ø È£ for the correct subject.

 Once all the pertinent information has been given, the serious work begins. It will take an eternity to process your report as copious amounts of vending machine coffee and cigarettes must be consumed. The captain, whose main task is to rearrrange the papers on his desk, may feel obligated to entertain you. After he has shown you his newly acquired video camera and wide screen television, he may pluck up enough courage to show you his private collection of UFO photos. Here's your chance to really dazzle him with your command of the Korean language by replying:

 6. ³ª´Â ´Ù¸¥È¤¼º¿¡ »ý¹°Ã¼°¡ ÀÖ´Ù°í¹Ï½À´Ï´Ù.

 Nannun darun hoke sung ay sang mool jay ga itdago mitsumnida.

 Yes, I do believe in life on other planets.

 Finally, the report will be completed. But the fun's not over yet. The captain will inform you that he doesn't possess the red stamp which certifies your document. The file must be faxed to the main police station, where you must go in order to retrieve your report with the aforementioned all important red stamp. Now would be a good time to ask:

 7. ´Ù¸¥ °æÂû¼­´Â ¾îµð¿¡ ÀÖ½À´Ï±î?

 Darun kyong chal su nun odi ay itsumnida?

 Oh, where is the other police station?

 Having found your way to the next police station, you will get yet another chance to practice all of the preceding phrases, with the exception of the UFO sentence. After some more head scratching on everyone's part, even you'll join in this time, the document will be found under a pile of books in a file marked 'Caution contents hot'. Of course,no one will know how it got there as they were out to lunch when the fax came in. The all important red seal will be affixed to the report by "He Who is the Bearer of the Red Seal" and you'll be free to go. My advice to you is to obtain three copies. Now it's off to Immigration or the consulate. If you're still feeling adventourous you can say:

 8. »õ·Î¿î ¿Ü±¹Àεî·ÏÁõÀ» ÇÊ¿ä·ÎÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

 Say ro oon way gook in dung roke jung ool pil yo ro hamnida.

 I need to apply for a new alien registration card.

 Hopefully these phrases will prove to be quite useful should you happen to lose something or want to discuss UFO government conspiracy theories. Remember above all remain calm and patient as things have a tendency to take longer than they would in your home country.

 Good luck!