I once met a woman who had the annoying habit of interrupting people when they spoke. So as a responsible citizen, I asked her if she realized what she was doing. She replied, "Yes, I know it's a bad habit, but it is my nature".
Indeed it was a bad habit, but it wasn't her nature (obviously an excuse she gave herself to justify it). She picked it up somewhere, and like a broken record, simply programmed herself to constntly do it.
We all have bad habits, some being great, others not so great. In the revolutionary book Megabrain, the author, Hutchinson, states that the brain is like a muscle, if you continually practice or exercise a habit, you will naturally develop it.
Why are habits so difficult to break? Well most of the time we tend to attack the symptoms rather than the actual causes. These causes are known as secondary gains. Something that is gained by keeping your habits. Most of the time we are not aware of these secondary gains. Here is an example: My friend Brian is a real whiner and complainere. I asked him one time "Why do you bitch so much?" First, he wasn't aware of it, then he said he got it from his mother. Then I asked him "what do you gain from complaining?" He realized (this was an actual revelation) that complaining gave him sympathy and attention, something he lacked as a child. It also allowed him to remain stagnant. His biggest complaint was that he was too busy, but the truth was that he wasn't. Like a broken record, he allowed himself to complain about being too busy, in order to remain inactive.
So how do you break unwanted habits? Here are a few tricks which may help you out. By the way this is not a twelve step method of habit breaking, these are only a few tips.
1) Find out what the real causes or secondary gains of your habits are, and really become aware of them.
2) Concentrate on the cost or pain which results from keeping the habit. Example: Remember the woman I met who constantly interrupts people when they speak? She gained absolutely nothing from it, and the cost is possibly having problems making new friends as well as cauasing annoyance and frustrations to others on the other's behalf. You will realize that keeping a bad habit is actually more costly than rewarding.
3) Try to break the pattern of using your habit. Pretend or even visualize that this habit is like a bad Korean or English pop song which plays over and over again. Instead of listening to it, visualize yourself taking a hammer and breaking the CD to pieces, really smashing it. Visualization is a very effective tool when it comes to breaking habits.
Finally don't be discouraged if it persists, and do not think that there is something wrong with you, because there really isn't. We all have a bag-full of unwanted habits, which we would love to discard. Take full responsibility for your actions and reward yourself if you do kick a bad habit. When this happens, replace the void with something new and more empowering or exciting. For example, I discarded the habits of being too shy, and not fully expressing my feelings to others, and replaced them with singing in public and helping others as a volunteer counselor.
Remember, perfection doesn't exist, so it is one less thing you have to worry about, most importantly, try not to surround yourself with excuses, as this just justifies the habit, and slows down the re-programming process, like new weeds you will have to pull out of your garden.
Good luck, and have fun breaking those old broken records, we call bad habits.