"Oh, you poor thing!"
Those are usually the first words I hear when I tell other expats that I have a homestay with my boss and his family. These are occasionally followed by, "You should break the contract and find a new job. You can do better than that." Let's face it, homestays have a bad reputation in this country. I'm sure we could easily fill an entire issue of this publication with the horror stories that abound and still have some to spare.
So it's time to hear the story of a good homestay experience and finally acknowledge (however grudgingly) that they do exist, despite the negativity that surrounds them. I arrived in Pusan over 10 months ago and still remember my initial impressions vividly. I live on the seventh floor of a very new (only three years old) high rise apartment. I walked in to find a fairly spacious, clean, well-lit apartment with four bedrooms and two bathrooms. It was made even more spacious by the almost complete lack of furniture.
One large area rug and a seat cushion in the corner are all that adorn the living room in terms of seating. A bit of a surprise at first but quite acceptable over the long-term. Next on the tour was the bathroom. I have the luxury of having one of the two all to myself. It is also quite acceptable, complete with western toilet, bathtub and shower.
Then came the bedroom. Again it seemed quite satisfactory, being about the same size as my room back in Canada and containing a built-in closet, desk and chairs and veranda. Only one thing was missing � a bed. When you've just traveled half way around the world to a strange country, where the people speak a different language, the stench in the air is nauseating and jetlag is quickly making its presence known, all you can think of is a nice long sleep in a cozy bed. To walk in and learn that your bed for the next 365 days is a thin mat on the floor is almost enough to break the strongest of hearts.
I have since seen the accomodations of several other expats and have come to realize that my initial impressions were narrow-minded and based solely on my Canadian experience of housing. By Korean standards, I've come to realize that this place is a veritable palace.
The director and his wife are a nice couple in their early 40's. They have two kids, a 13 year-old boy and a 15 year old daughter. No pets (big surprise!) Both the husband and wife work in the hagwon and my boss told me one night (over a bottle of soju) that it's actually his wife who owns it. She maintains her "traditional" role as wife and mother and then puts in a good eight hours at the school in the evenings. The husband puts in a few more hours there, taking care of day to day business and maintenance, etc. At home he is a caring, responsible father and husband and has even been seen cooking and washing dishes on occasion (imagine that!)
One of the true joys of the homestay is the food and the kitchen. I don't have to buy a lot of basic cooking ingredients or cookery since the family already has them and offer them freely. But for the true homestay experience, I can enjoy freshly cooked Korean meals on a daily basis - all the kimchi you can eat!
Then we have the cultural advantage. By living with the family for a year, I've had countless insights into the daily life of Korean people. One day, they decided it would be a nice gesture to make me a hanbok (the traditional Korean dress). A week later the mother and I picked out the material. Which was difficult as she speaks no English, so my Korean language skills have also developed faster due to this constant immersion in the language. For the next 2 or 3 weeks she spent her free time working on the dress. I learned later that she was professionally trained in the art. No souvenir I buy could be as special as this gift.
Final impressions? I've really enjoyed my homestay and considered it to have been a very rewarding experience, but I wouldn't do it again despite my glowing praise. It was a good learning experience; one which I'll never regret.