Some people have said that the culture here is different, that people live by different rules. I disagree. Koreans, like all the rest of us, get away with what they can. Here are some of my favorite examples.

1.The scene is MacDonalds. The glorious golden arches shed their ruddy light over the damp rainy streets. Their reflection in the highway is disturbed only by the maniacal bus drivers swerving to run over some offending pedestrian. And there at the counter of all things preprossessed and beautiful are two monks, two vegetarian monks, ordering up a couple of cheeseburgers.

2.I’m going down four flights of stairs into the subway. The tired and bent cleaning lady sweeps at the loose Pusan dust with her bent and bristled broom. Three men in blue uniforms are pointing at each other and shouting. As I close in I recognize by their uniforms and recent departure from adolescence that they are officers of the peace. The telltale shouting kawi, bawi, boh and the swiftly flashing fingers lead me to the surprising conclusion that they are playing the ancient Korean tribal game of paper-scissors-rock. The victor gains the incredible honour of climbing up one more step on the subway staircase.

3.On a crowded, sweaty, moving mass of jerking humanity stands me, praying that my vertebrae can stand one more bus stop. The familiar noxious combination of perfume and raw garlic mixed with the ghastly sight of melting make-up to form a remarkably unsettled feeling at the back of my stomach. My wife struggles and fumbles her way to the front of the swaying beast and asks our mad leader if the bus is going to Song Jong. He grunts and shakes his head, flames bursting from his nostrils. He fires off his trumpet at another offending taxi and my wife wanders back to our four square-inch world. We decide to jump ship the next time the hatch opens and we slow below 20kph. Just as we are about to flee, the mad driver hollers at us and swerves to the left, neatly cutting off the 100 bus. He slams open his window, yells something about miguk and Song Jong, and our fellow inmates usher us into the other bus. The other bus that brought us right to our stop. No kidding.